Why Does Everything Hurt?
The Menopause-Pain Connection Nobody Talks About
Part One of Three
By Lioba Steinkamp MA, NVKH-RHom
"I Feel Like My Body Is Tearing Apart"
You wake up in the morning and before you even get out of bed, you feel it — a deep, tearing sensation through your muscles, along your tendons, into the places where your body holds itself together. It is not sharp or hot or swollen like arthritis. It is something harder to name: a diffuse, relentless aching through your fascia and connective tissue, as if your body's scaffolding is under protest.
You visit your doctor. Blood tests come back fine. You are told it might be stress, or aging, or perhaps fibromyalgia. You leave without real answers.
Sound familiar? You are not alone — and more importantly, you are not imagining it.
I know this experience personally. As a classical homeopath and a woman in my early fifties, I spent years searching for the source of exactly this kind of pain. What I discovered — through research, clinical practice, and my own body — is that there is a profound and almost entirely overlooked connection between menopause, connective tissue, and whole-body pain. And once you understand it, everything starts to make sense.
The Missing Link: Estrogen and Your Connective Tissue
Most women know that estrogen affects mood, the menstrual cycle, and bone density. What almost nobody explains is that estrogen is also one of the primary regulators of connective tissue throughout the entire body.
Fascia — the thin, continuous web of tissue that wraps around every muscle, organ, and bone — is directly influenced by estrogen. So are tendons, ligaments, and the entheses (the points where tendons attach to bone). When estrogen levels drop during perimenopause and menopause, these tissues lose hydration, elasticity, and structural integrity.
The result? Deep, diffuse pain that feels like tearing. Pain at tendon attachment points. Stiffness worst in the morning. A body that feels fundamentally different from the one you lived in at 35.
This is not fibromyalgia — though it can mimic it. It is not rheumatism — though it can resemble it. It is your connective tissue, the very fabric of your body, responding to a hormonal shift that mainstream medicine has barely begun to address.
Were You "Too Flexible" as a Child?
Here is where it gets even more interesting. When I was a little girl, they called me the snake woman. I could put my legs behind my head without warming up. I was extraordinarily flexible in the way some children are, and nobody thought anything of it.
What I did not know then — and what many women like me do not discover until midlife — is that this extreme flexibility is often a sign of a connective tissue condition called Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (hEDS) or Hypermobility Spectrum Disorder (HSD). These are hereditary conditions in which the collagen making up connective tissue is more elastic than average.
For most of life, this hypermobility feels like a gift. You are the flexible one in yoga class. Your joints move in ways others envy. But here is what happens at menopause: the muscles that have been quietly compensating for lax connective tissue your entire life suddenly have less hormonal support. The fascia and tendons — already working harder than average — lose the estrogen that helped maintain their integrity. And the whole system, which was managing just fine for decades, begins to struggle.
This is why so many hypermobile women hit a wall in their late forties and fifties that feels completely disproportionate to their age or fitness level. And it is why standard blood tests and standard treatments often fail — because the underlying mechanism is not being addressed.
Signs you may have undiagnosed hypermobility:
You were unusually flexible as a child or teenager
You could do the splits easily, or put your legs behind your head
You have a history of frequent joint sprains or dislocations
You bruise easily or have noticeably soft, stretchy skin
You have a history of digestive issues or irritable bowel
You experience more nervous system sensitivity or anxiety than others
Your pain is worst at tendon attachment points and along fascial lines
If several of these resonate, it is worth discussing hEDS or HSD with your GP and asking for a rheumatology referral. In the Netherlands, the Sint Maartenskliniek — with locations in Nijmegen and Ede — is an excellent starting point, holding EULAR's prestigious Centre of Excellence in Rheumatology designation.
The Overstretching Trap
If you are hypermobile and in pain, you are probably stretching to relieve that pain. And that stretching — however good it feels in the moment — is very likely making things worse.
Hypermobile connective tissue does not need more lengthening. It needs support, stability, and strength. When you stretch deeply, you push already lax joints and fascia beyond their comfortable range, creating microinstability that surrounding muscles then have to work even harder to compensate for. The brief relief is real. The payback comes the next day.
Movement that helps most: clinical Pilates, gentle resistance work, swimming, and restorative yoga. In any stretch-based practice — stay at around 80% of your range. That 20% you leave behind is the 20% that was destabilising you.
There Is Hope
hEDS and HSD are lifelong conditions — the underlying connective tissue does not change. But pain-free, or near pain-free, is absolutely achievable for many women with the right support. The biggest turning point is usually not a single treatment — it is finally understanding what is happening in your body, and why.
You have been hypermobile your whole life. Your body has been compensating quietly for decades. The pain you feel now is not weakness or failure — it is a signal that something needs to change in how you support and move your body. Once you understand that, you can begin to work with it rather than against it.
Spring is a good time to begin. 🌱
Coming in Part Two: Feeding Your Fascia — how nutrition, targeted supplements, and cell salts can support connective tissue healing from within.
About the Author
Lioba Steinkamp MA, NVKH-RHom is a classical homeopath based in Arnhem, Netherlands. Her practice, Insight Homeopathy, bridges rigorous classical homeopathic methodology with a broad, integrative perspective — addressing the physical, emotional, and systemic challenges of our time. She brings particular depth to complex hormonal, connective tissue, and chronic conditions, weaving together leading homeopathic frameworks with insights from nutritional science, somatic medicine, and holistic health. www.insighthomeopathy.nl
Important note: This article series is written from personal experience and professional interest. It is intended as informational and supportive reading, not as a replacement for medical or homeopathic advice. For a personal consultation, please visit www.insighthomeopathy.nl
